The scandalous truth about the cocktails and shots we ordered once upon a time in an embarrassing and awkward moment of shameful abandon is we actually remember the sordid details long into the future.  Surprisingly enough it doesn’t take liquid courage to recount the flash of tacky tippling.  Mat shots as a rite of passage, the call of a blow job shot quieting the bar and girlie fru fru drinks in the hands of manly men are all no brainers after the fact, but x marks the spot when friends are calling the shots.

Readers fessed up to The Intoxicologist on Twitter and Facebook about the most embarrassing shot or cocktail they ever ordered, what made them do it and ultimately what they learned.  Answers tickled and induced the ‘blech’ factor.

Lilly Pad consisting of Malibu Rum, Midori, Blue Curacao and pineapple juice seemed a good idea at the time to Ben Newton-Syms.  According to Ben, “The official excuse; the bartender looked like he’d massacre anything classic and make me angry. The guilty truth; I wanted a drink garnished with a gummy frog.  Oh dear.”  Gummy bears, worms, octopi and frogs might be on my list of chewy, fruit musts when I’m in the mood for ripping limbs from helpless candies, but never a good idea for cocktail garnish.  When in doubt of a bartender’s ability to build a classic, go for the straight pour and ask for a side dish of gummy Froggers.

Speaking of Midori in the Lilly Pad, Theresa Dobey mentions the Ninja Turtle.  This little number contains Midori and Pina Colada. Theresa describes it as, “Super gross, not good, not good at all.” Ya think?!  I can just imagine swirls of green sweetened liqueur swimming around in milky, creamy Pina Colada mix.  Ewww!  However a Pina Colada in its finest form is another story altogether.  Skip the girlie umbrellas, frilly straws and pre-made mixes and go for the well built cocktail ala Dale DeGroff.

Pina Colada – Dale DeGroff, Craft of the Cocktail

1-1/2 ounce Bacardi Light Rum
1 ounce Myers’s Rum
2 ounce Coco Lopez
1 ounce Heavy Cream
4 ounce Pineapple Juice
Dash of Angostura Bitters
1 Cup Crushed Ice
Garnish – Pineapple Wedge & Maraschino Cherry

Combine all ingredients except garnish into a blender and blend until all ice is completely mixed in. Any chunks get caught in straws, so be sure to mix very well. Pour into either a hurricane glass or a poco-grande glass. Place pineapple and cherry on a garnish skewer and place in the drink.  The Intoxicologist Notation: To send this cocktail into total ‘yum’ factor add an additional 1/2 to 3/4 ounce Myers Rum float to the top of the finished cocktail.

The Blow Job shot always seems to come up (no pun intended) when shots are spoken of in any conversation.  Many Twitter and Facebook readers mentioned this shot as the one that caused their most embarrassing moment.  Whether the name of the shot itself caused deafening quiet to filter across the crowd as the shot was called out or due to the way the shot is downed on knees, no hands at the foot of a stranger by brides to be or their entourage of giggling friends.  However, one reader comment regarding the Blow Job shot truly stole the show.

 “BJ…and drank it with no hands…I really don’t need to explain right? What did I learn….Well..Either one can make you choke. (You asked :)” – Ginger Sanders

Enough said.  Let’s get off the Blow Job and Orgasm shots for a change and move on to something a little less obvious for giggles and grins like…

Deep Throat – from X-Rated Drinks

1-1/2 ounce Vodka

1/4 ounce Coffee Liqueur

Whipped Cream Garnish

Combine liquids in cocktail shaker with ice. Shake. Strain into two shot glasses. Top with whipped cream.

G-Spot – from X-Rated Drinks

1/8 ounce Vodka

1/4 ounce Licor 43

1/2 ounce Raspberry Liqueur

Dash Sour Mix

Dash Club Soda

Combine all ingredients except club soda in cocktail shaker with ice.  Shake.  Strain into shot glass.  Top with club soda.

Time for you to play along and tattle on your shameful tipples.  What cocktail or shot tickled your tonsils while inducing the discomfort level?  The article that inspired the entire discussion stemmed from Modern Drunkard: You Want a What?

All content ©2010 Cheri Loughlin, The Intoxicologist. All Rights Reserved. Chat with Cheri @Intoxicologist on Twitter and or

Embarrassing Truth about the Cocktails & Shots We Order